Originally I didn't want this blog to be about my everyday life, and I still don't, however sometimes the two collide. So here is a little piece of me.....
I know the last six months of my life have been truly confusing to some, others are probably curious, I know some could care less, and others can't wrap their head around the madness even when they try.
To be blunt, I am utterly exhausted from answering all the questions people have, while also attempting to understand the insanity of it all. While answering all the questions I have tried to stay strong, light hearted, positive, and thankful, but I am tired of hearing myself. So, here is the story. If you ask me again what the plan is, I am going to refer you here. Just sayin.....
Just over a year ago I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis (which was heartbreaking for all involved) for sometime all I wanted to do was lay in bed and cry. I had gone blind in one eye, was starting a brand new job, caring for an infant essentially alone while my husband attended school, and living in crap shoot Alabama. Sounds fun right? It's amazing that my marriage and friendships survived that time (some friendships didn't).
Because of the MS and the medication I am SUPER sensitive to the heat. I would be at work, chasing little people around, sweating my ass off, while everyone else wore coats. There were times I was so hot I had to strip down to a tank top and my jeans at work and it was the dead of winter! (Real professional right?) And yes I know, Alabama doesn't get frigid winters but come on, a tank top in January?
As I complained to my neurologist about how hot I was all the time, Big Papa and I were playing with the idea of moving. The two years we committed to in crap shoot Alabama were coming to an end and we wanted out! Big Papa doesn't have much longer before he can retire so we both wanted to go somewhere we might not go otherwise, Alaska. My neuro thought because of my heat sensitivity it couldn't be a bad place for me, so he wrote the United States Army a letter on mine and Big Papa's behalf. A matter of a few weeks later, and we had orders.(We aren't sure if the letter had anything to do with the move or not, but we were stoked!) Alaska here we come!
I quit my new job (where I had FINALLY started to make friends and fit in), we packed up our lives, left the few friends we had and started our journey. And what a journey its been!
Big Papa got to AK with our super cool dog. Myself, sweets, and the cat were soon to follow. And hopefully our furniture and things wouldn't be to far behind us. (That seems like such a ridiculous and funny thought now!)
Let's just say unpacking is going to feel like Christmas!
The Army has a program that is SUPPOSED to keep families together, especially if one member of the family has some sort of medical issue. (The thought of this makes me want to fall on the floor in hysterical laughter....what a joke!) No, it's just another reason to separate families and make spouses feel like garbage!
So like a good, compliant military family I enroll. Looking back, I should have known better!
Someone, somewhere along the way decided that because I was in the program, and had multiple sclerosis they weren't going to provide me with care in Alaska. (Some ignorant fool told Big Papa there were no neurologists in Fairbanks, ummm there were 3 all of which would take me as a patient, we called.) We were told I could go and be with Big Papa, but my medical insurance was essentially null and void. If I needed care, it came out of our pocket! Do they know what an MRI costs? Do they know what they pay my husband to support his family? Are you fucking kidding me? (Before anyone gets mouthy, yes I know I can get my own health insurance but there were other things that came into play, financially we couldn't do it without support from the military.)
So the agency that claims to be very family oriented, has separated us, and is refusing to let us be together. Why? Because the cold is bad for me. Huh? Who said that?
So Big Papa climbs the big boss chain, calls in favors and we wait. In the meantime, sweets and I go to Alaska for a vacation. (We had already bought a one way ticket, and I wasn't about to give that up.) We spent 6 weeks together and were once again separated.
Since May, Big Papa has spent less than 2 months with his wife and daughter. He has been living in an empty three bedroom home with no furniture and a dog. (That's right, he has a couch that we had to buy, a chair and a TV.) Luckily we figured we would be separate from our things for a month or so, so Big Papa hauled a few things North that he knew he would need. Sweets and I had most of our summer clothes with us, but all my winter clothes and winter shoes sit somewhere in Alabama in boxes. Did I mention Big Papa is paying nearly 2 grand to live in an empty house he thought he would share with his wife and daughter?
Sweets and I essentially moved in with my mom. The benefit? Sweets knows my mom very well and they are madly in love. Never did I think I would be living with my mom and daughter while my husband sat in an empty house with our super cool dog.
In August we learned we would have to wait until October to be reunited (some BS about the fiscal year). At that point it was only a month or so. We could do that even though we were annoyed and lonely.
October came and went. Here it is December and we just got official word.
Sweets and I are NOT joining the boys in Alaska. Instead Big Papa is getting compassionate reassignment (just in case I get so sick and he has to take care of me). Hold on, I cant stop laughing!
So we got kicked out of Alaska because its too cold (I don't know where the person who made that decision got their MD from but whatever) and got reassigned to the lovely, beautiful, so sophisticated El Paso! (Yes, this decision makes a lot of sense...I am heat sensitive so send me to little Mexico where I can still wear tank tops year round and look like a total ass!)
So there you have it. That is the last 6 months of irritation and frustration rolled into this blog. Unlike before, I now have a few answers and so do you, so please don't ask.
